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# Who Are You Beyond your Character?
- URL: https://www.overworkedmoms.com/who-are-you-beyond-your-character/
- Published: 2026-09-03T09:57:39.000Z
- Updated: 2026-09-03T09:57:39.000Z
- Author: OverworkedMom

Who are you? Seriously, who are you? Do you know who YOU are as an individual self? I recently stumbled upon this question, asking who you are outside of labels like mum, daughter, wife, or whatever your work title is. It really got me thinking because we play these roles from the moment we wake up until we go to sleep.

I noticed even the clothes I wear—I buy them for practicality. They work for different occasions, colour-safe washing, comfortable, doesn't shrink and wrinkle free. I don't need to spend time ironing. I buy mostly black and blue, making it easy to pair things together. But are those clothes really me? My first thought was, "yes, they are me. I'm happy wearing them". But then I realized I bought them because they're suitable for all these roles I play, interchangeable for everything I do throughout the day.

Then I wondered, if this applies to my clothes, what about how I groom myself?

I love having my nails painted. Ever since I was a teenager, colorful and patterned nails have been a joy for me. But I haven't done my nails in ages. Why is that? First, I don't really have the time. It takes about two hours to do it at a salon, 1 hour to do it at home (because I skip some steps). My weekdays are packed. On weekends, I'm usually doing something that involves my hands so they're not really available for 1 hour straight. Secondly, there's the cost—I could use that money for other things. Third, the logical justification: even if I do get my nails done, they don't last long. I can’t do washing up or play sports properly with long nails. 

So, it seems my nails are also about convenience, rather than being truly me.

Outside of clothes and nails, I also question what I do in my free time. The books I read—are they really a reflection of me? It's quite jarring to think about. Who are you, really? Are you doing things because they're convenient or because they fit the role of a mum, or whatever other roles you have in life?